Chronic Worry? How To Be Happy Instead

Worry happens to all of us, but there’s a kind of worry that not threatens your success; it is downright dangerous to your health. This is chronic worry, and it makes you ruminate endlessly about anything that might go wrong.

Chronic worry about life’s events won’t change them; it will impair you. It is a tragic misuse of your imagination to worry about awful things that might happen in your future. This insidious form of chronic worry is like a virus of the mind that breeds negativity and powerlessness.

Spiritual teachers label worry a sign of ego, and for good cause:  when we worry, we erroneously take responsibility for all the things we worry about. Worriers falsely think they are responsible for it all.

How futile! None of us can worry ourselves well, or worry our way to fat bank accounts, or worry away the problems of the world.

The beloved humorist Erma Bombeck used to say: “Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.”

You and I grew up despite the worries of our parents; we explored, failed, experimented and learned how to navigate life by doing, not by worrying. And the same holds true for our loved ones. When you worry about what will become of your child, your parent or your job, you are not helping anybody – least of all yourself.  In fact, you are assuming a false sense of responsibility for the choices of another. You may even think that by worrying, you can change events.

The bottom line is this: you are not responsible for the choices of others. Worrying about these things is not an act of faith; it is an act of fear. Author Leo Buscaglia put it this way: “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

Wouldn’t it be a whole lot more practical to focus on the things you CAN do today, instead of worrying about what tomorrow may bring?

The vast majority of things we worry about in life, never happen. Worry is simply the ego’s way of conjuring up worst case scenarios in a futile attempt to prepare for whatever might happen… or not!

Chronic worry will drain your energy, sap your strength and rob you of sleep.  Over time, the impact of continuous worry presents as anxiety and a host of physical problems ranging from headaches and sleep disturbances to high blood pressure and mood disorders.

Indeed! If a problem can be solved, there is no need to worry about it.  If the problem cannot be solved or it is not your task to solve it, what is the use of worrying about it?

Worrying is a learned response that leads to negativity. Self-responsibility, on the other hand, is a learned response that leads to positivity.  And you can to meet life’s challenges with self-responsibility instead of chronic worry.

When facing an actual challenge, you’d do better by following a few clear guidelines before automatically starting to worry about it:

  • Is this situation your personal responsibility? If not, let it go!
  • If the situation is indeed your responsibility, what’s the worst thing that can happen? Accept the worst-case scenario as your baseline, and then start building a creative solution from there.
  • Pay attention to what is needed now. Ask yourself how your wise Higher self would deal with the situation. What can you do about the situation right now? Take responsibility for your life and actions, and make a list of possible things you can do, including getting more facts or information.
  • And now, take action in day-tight compartments, as motivational guru Dale Carnegie described present-moment awareness. Do what you can with what you know right now, even if it is only a small step, and let go of worry! Tomorrow may bring additional options and insights to act on, but worrying about it today will not change outcomes.
  • Avoid rumination. When you ruminate on a problem, you are not creating solutions; you are feeding the problem instead. To break this negative cycle, you need to disrupt the rumination and reconnect to the present moment every time it happens.
  • Remember that you can adapt, create, change and evolve as part of the problem-solving process. If your plan A doesn’t work, keep in mind that the alphabet has 25 more letters!
  • And, finally, count your blessings, not your troubles. Remember that whatever you focus on, tends to expand. So focus on the blessings of your life; cultivate an attitude of gratitude for little things that brighten your day, and you will find yourself uplifted.

By consciously choosing how you respond to life’s challenges, you can unlearn the nasty habit of worry and act from your happy place instead.

About the author

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Befriending Problems

When we look out at the world, we see situations everywhere that appear to be broken and need fixing. What would happen if we could befriend problems and life crises as opportunities for growth instead?

There is an active intersection between our own psychological/spiritual health and the actual landscape of our life. What happens in the collective does impact us as individuals; likewise, what we do as individuals has an impact on the collective.

The way we address crises and problems has a rippling effect for better or for worse into the larger world. It offers us opportunities for positive change and personal growth. Author Tom Atlee calls crisis “the dangerous breaking of glass that opens locked windows of opportunity that require perceptiveness and courage to move through with care.”

It has been said that evolution, like water behind a dam, knows where all the cracks are, and is working on them right now with increasing intensity.

Could it be that something new is trying to happen, seeking the transformation of the whole in life? Might our out-of-balance world be an opportunity for increased spiritual consciousness seeking to awaken the values of the heart – compassion, generosity, forgiveness, and a desire to live in harmony with others?

I propose that the only way forward through times of crisis, upheaval and difficulty is to befriend our problems as the messengers that they are: highlighting the empty, loveless or meaningless places in our life that thirst for something meaningful and real.

To anxiously hold to the way things were – wanting no disruption in our lives – is to avoid evolving because our individual status quo is really closely tied to the larger malaise on the planet.

I remember being surprised years ago when I read Care of the Soul by Thomas Moore. One of the chapters he titled “The Gift of Depression.” I had to think about that.

What if we learned to cope with adversity more effectively? Rather than failing to notice the opportunities that adversity offers, we could see the problem and the solution as two sides of the same coin. To get to the other side, we often are called to walk thru turbulence we would rather have avoided. But denial disempowers, whereas facing our problems empowers us to take meaningful action!

In fact, today’s heartache may well carry the seeds of tomorrow’s happiness. What would happen if the hatching chick decided that it is too much effort to peck through the shell that encases it?

Who would you be today if it weren’t for your struggles? Think back. Wasn’t there a jewel of awareness and growth offered in almost every tribulation?

It is the decisions you’ve made at each challenging point in your life that determined where you are today.

When we treat each obstacle on our path as a unique opportunity for growth, we start asking different questions.  We stop asking “Why this?” Why me?” and “Why now?” Instead, we start asking how we can navigate through the challenge, what we need to learn or do, and we accept responsibility for our part in the unfolding journey of our lives.

We befriend obstacles as messengers for deepening our faith and we dig deep to discover hidden gifts and abilities we never knew we had. We start looking for what we can do with the resources we have right now – an empowering place from where we can learn, evolve and become the powerful beings we were created to be.

In fact, I believe that when we connect to the true potential within us, we also find there the ability to help restore love, hope and unity to the wider world around us.

We could, as Tom Atlee suggests, “use our differences and our challenges creatively, not simply as problems to avoid or solve, but as signs of new life pushing to emerge – and as invitations into a new, more whole tomorrow.”

Responding appropriately to this invitation is of the utmost importance in our changing world. The waves of change that sweep through all layers of life like a tsunami, carry seeds of opportunity.

By viewing problems as opportunities into a “not-yet-known” future, instead of fearing the unknown, we can move forward gracefully.

About the author

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Freedom From Emotional Pain

Emotional pain can traumatize us long after the event that triggered it. The more traumatizing the event, the more we tend to revisit memories, thereby keeping the pain alive.

We do this not because we wish to suffer, but because we simply don’t realize the power of our thoughts. We don’t recognize that it is not the traumatic event, but our thinking about that event, that continues to perpetuate the pain.

The mind does not know the difference between actual events and thoughts about them. To the mind, thoughts are as real as the events they represent, and so we keep reliving the painful trauma of past events as long as we replay these thoughts in our minds.

Breaking free from this cycle requires that we recognize the process and choose different responses to it. As soon as we stop giving our life energy to memories that seem to be overpowering, those memories lose their illusion of power. In the very moment of choosing differently, we are also released from the ongoing emotional pain of suffering over what had happened to us in the past.

Negative memories do not have an individual, independent existence. When we falsely believe that what happened in the past still has power over us, we allow ourselves to revisit the tyranny of emotional pain triggered by those past memories. It really serves no purpose now!

Think about it for a moment: in order for the person who broke up with you to still be able to hurt you now, in this moment, they need to be breaking up with you now, at this very moment. In reality, the event has passed and is no longer taking place in your present reality – yet you continue to suffer because you are replaying the details of the event in your mind, allowing the memories to trigger emotional pain each time you think about it!

Nothing, absolutely nothing can have power over us unless we give it that power. When we truly understand this principle, we can begin to free ourselves from the emotional pain of negative memories.

Instead of seeing ourselves as victims of circumstances beyond our control, we can exercise our innate power to choose what we focus on. And whatever we choose to focus on, becomes our reality.

Our perception produces what we experience. This perception is made up of many different elements, all of which are based on our subjective interpretation of reality – not the objective reality. When we view events this way, we relate to life through these subjective filters of attachment, desire, lack or fear.

These subjective filters of perception form our viewpoint of any given experience and then flavor our interpretation with emotion. It is not the relationship breakup that causes our current pain, then, but the painful meaning we attached to that memory. Our perception labeled the event as “heart-breaking” or as our “one and only chance at love” or as a “vicious betrayal.”

In reality, the event itself was simply part of the ongoing unfolding of life – it was neither good nor bad. It’s our interpretation of the event that creates the joy or emotional pain we associate with it.

If our perception causes pain, then why don’t we just let events happen spontaneously without grabbing onto them and interpreting their ‘meaning’ from our particular viewpoint? Why do we choose to continue experiencing the emotional pain?

I believe we interpret events through the filters of our perception because we’ve become so used to drama and trauma, pain and suffering that we are not sure who we are without it. As strange as it may seem, we welcome the habitual demons of emotional pain because it makes us feel alive.

But this is not our true nature. It’s always the false self – the ego – that thrives on the drama of emotional pain. At the same time, you and I are not just egos; we are spiritual beings who live in human form with the ego as our constant companion.

We can free ourselves from the false suffering of ongoing emotional pain to embrace a higher way of life! The perception of pain as evidence of being alive does not come from the soul; it stems from the ego’s attempts to resist change and maintain the status quo at all costs. All these conditions that seemed so real and painful are the creation of faulty perception as directed by the ego!

It is our misguided belief that past events have the power to hurt us that makes them continue to appear hurtful and propagates the emotional pain. Once we choose to remove our focus from the events, the energy around the memories collapses and we can move on.

We can accelerate this process by bringing fresh logic to the situation. Everything that is created has both a beginning and an end; therefore, everything we experience over the course of life, eventually passes to make room for new events and experiences. And so, even the most painful events of our lives also pass with time. We can help this process along by becoming mindful of what we focus on and staying present in each moment.

Even if we’ve suffered for years because of the way our perception interpreted what happened to us, we no longer need to suffer this pain. Now that we understand how the process works, we no longer need to be a victim of our own misunderstanding. We can inwardly say to that suffering ego state,

“Ego, you are not the ruling power in my life – you only think you are. The knots in my life that have me all tied up have no power over me outside of my own perception. It is ego’s perception that led me to interpret these events as emotional pain, but now I choose to see things as they really are.”

Then we can turn our focus away from the ego’s habitual re-runs of past traumas. We can let go of the emotional pain. Instead, we can turn toward Truth within to reclaim our peace in this present moment.

When we release the past, we become free at last to embrace our birthright of peace in this present moment.

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

How Your Destiny Shapes You

The coming year will shape the destiny of every human being on this planet because it will offer every person pivotal opportunities for personal and global transformation.

The question each of us should ask is, “How will the forces guiding my life affect me in the next year?” Why? Because they are already doing that right now!

Whatever you’re working on in your life, is already working on you.  Over the course of time, these forces will shape your life both on the surface and from within.

Nobody’s life is the same at the end of a year – any year – as it is at the beginning. You are building your life from the inside out even as it is working on you.

What do you plan to work on in the coming year?  Getting clear on the purpose and plan for your soul is essential because it will ultimately direct where you end up over the course of the next year.

Business philosopher Jim Rohn put it this way: “If you go to work on your goals, your goals will go to work on you. If you go to work on your plan, your plan will go to work on you. Whatever good things we build, will end up building us.”

These are some valuable lessons to be gleaned here.

First is that life is a process, not a destination. Every year is simply a measure of life, a slice of the big picture. Instead of falling into the trap of reductionism and reducing life to a game of basic outcomes, why not become more conscious of the process, the journey?

You are building a life, not a year. The kind of life you build is going to be determined by the kind of goals and plans you work on, because they’ll work on you as well.

And that’s the second lesson: Your choice of goals means much more than just what you accomplish. You are choosing what you become, too!

Deepak Chopra has said that the activities on the surface of our lives distract us from the deeper work of soul making. You do not need to get caught up in the distractions of life to the detriment of your soul!  This year, resolve to see your life as a sacred process of soul making. Let that Higher awareness guide your life journey. You are not meant to simply ACHIEVE something; you are here to BECOME something.  And that process happens along the way, not at some magical destination.

The third lesson is this: it’s not just the good things we build that matter, but everything we build. They all matter because they all work on us.

If you use shame, blame, guilt or fear as building blocks for your life, that’s what you’ll ultimately have. If you avoid the effort of introspection, personal honesty and spiritual alignment, you may think you’re not building anything, but you are – and you’re not going to like the result, so why even go there?

On the other hand, if you build toward your highest potential, you facilitate the unfolding of your best life yet.

Reaching your highest potential is your soul’s ultimate purpose. It is revealed to you within the process of seeking to fulfill your highest potential, service and creativity. When you seriously engage in the work of healing the wounded psyche with Truth, you enable your highest potential to radiate from your core.

These are the goals that ought to guide you, for they will reveal the true blueprint of your life. They will direct your path, your purpose and your potential to bring about the highest unfolding of your being.

If you’re going to build something in your life during the next twelve months, make it something that you love and respect. It’ll shape you into someone you can love and respect!

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Moving Beyond Limitations

“We sometimes feel that what we do
is just a drop in the ocean, but the
ocean would be less because of that
missing drop.” – Mother Teresa

One of the reasons we get intimidated by the process of living, is that we think our part is not grand enough.

After all, the movers and shakers featured in the media are usually pretty big and powerful. We hear about philanthropists such as Bill Gates who spends millions to find a cure for malaria, or larger-than-life personalities like Oprah who has touched the lives of millions more with her media empire.

When we compare our small beginnings and meager efforts to these icons, we may feel so insignificant that we give up. We cringe as the inner critic whispers, ‘Who are you to think that you can change things out there when you haven’t even mastered your own health, or finances, or relationships?’

We compare our own weaknesses to the strengths of others and when it feels too overwhelming, we give up. And so we forget that we are an integral part of a larger whole; a precious drop in the ocean of life. Yet when we give up on our dreams, the whole world misses out!

We think that we have to be big, powerful or perfect before we can make a difference. And so we disqualify ourselves before we even start.

Here’s an important truth to remember: you do not have to be big, powerful or perfect to make a difference in the world – you simply have to be willing!

It has been said that when you argue for limitations, you make them yours. While we focus on our own limitations, we miss a crucial point: those individuals make a difference in the world despite their own weaknesses. Their lives are not perfect; yet they have made a commitment to argue for their potential and not for their liabilities!

And while critics like to point out their weaknesses, these brave souls make a meaningful contribution to the world because they choose to focus on what they can do despite these limitations.

Andrea Bocelli became one of the finest vocalists of our time despite the fact that he is blind. Mother Teresa founded an order that ministers to the sick and dying worldwide despite the fact that she never had a university education. Nelson Mandela became the leader of a nation, guiding millions away from racist politics and toward equality, despite the fact that he had become estranged from his wife after he’d spent 26 years in prison.

People like these made – and continue to make – a huge difference in the world. Their contributions to society are like precious drops of water that raises the level of the ocean for everyone. And they made a difference despite their personal weaknesses, limitations or liabilities!

As humans, we are all interconnected in the field of consciousness. We are affected by the struggles of others; we are also uplifted by their greatness. Each of us has the potential to either uplift or to detract from life. Every day, life offers us the opportunity to reach deep within and to add our share like a precious drop to the ocean of human consciousness so everyone can be uplifted by it.

No matter how insignificant your contribution may seem, you can make a difference. Life does not require you to become rich, or perfect, or famous in order to make a difference. It simply requires you to start.

Start with small steps you can take day by day. What is your heart calling you to do? Which one person can you reach out to today? What small step can you take to contribute your drop to the ocean of life right now?

Recognize the small ways in which you can make a difference. Feel the fear and self-doubt, and then take that step to contribute anyway!

That’s how greatness is born: knowing that you can make a meaningful difference even when there are other areas of your life that are still in process. Look past your limitations and act from your potential. The world is awaiting your gifts!

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Feeling Stuck Or Constrained? A Call To Higher Ground

Feeling stuck in life at this time?  Frustrated? Take a moment to really feel what is going on.  You are not stuck… you are simply constrained.

Yes, the old way of doing things no longer works, and you are trying to adjust to radical new ways of looking at life, doing things, and even living.

Outside yourself, the whole world is going through a spin cycle.  Deep wounds in the collective psyche of mankind are surfacing, releasing both great horror and amazing opportunity.  Societies hunger not for war or peace, but for Truth to cut through illusion and bring about spiritual healing at the deepest levels of being.

Never before in the history of the planet has there been such a clarion call for healing to avert global destruction. The time for dilly-dallying and empty promises is over. It is time to heal our world – starting with ourselves!

The truth is that, throughout this time of constraint and upheaval, there are unseen forces holding you steady while you learn to run this new kind of energy… the energy of oneness with Divine purpose.  It is your Divine connection, hosted in a human shell.  Long ago, before you ever came into this life, you chose to embody this energy at this time.  It is your contribution to the shift of the ages, and now is your time to fulfill that agreement.

The energy of Divine oneness or unity is the most powerful force in the Universe.  It is powerful enough to constrain you when you try to separate from Divine guidance at your core and assert your human will.

In the old way of life, we learned to accomplish goals by asserting our human, ego wills in the external reality.  We were conditioned to be willful and determined, wanting whatever we chose to have when we decided to have it.

This way no longer works. When we push forward through our human ego in the new energy that surrounds us now, there are numerous obstacles constraining us.

To move past these constraints, we have to give up the drive to accomplish things by sheer force of will.  Instead, we need to align with the power of All That Is.  We need to surrender to trust: trust in the Divine, in Higher Guidance, in Spirit, God… whatever you choose to call the essential life force energy.

When we choose to trust, the energy of the ego yields and aligns to a bigger plan – the higher picture of Divine perfection.  From that place of alignment, we are able to flow with creative energies to create a higher reality than we could have ever conceived of before.

It is no longer possible to more forward in ego and still make spiritual progress.  The constraining force of Spirit will block your movement at every turn – the old ways of doing need to be surrendered to embrace higher ways of being.

Spirit will get you through this time of transition, no matter how difficult it feels.  Those same unseen forces that hold you steady now, can and will lift you out of the illusion of despair.  All it takes is for you to let go of the old way of using power, and to embrace the path of alignment – the pathway of trust and allowing.

We are living in a very different reality now than we were in even five years ago.  The old life with its hopes and dreams, has been filed away in the archives of All That Is.  To keep looking for it, merely deters our progress.

Instead, now is the time to embrace what shows up in your life moment by moment.  Look for new ways to reframe things, new tools to do things with.

Go inward.  Drink deep from the wellspring of life.  Let the timeless wisdom and healing energy of sacred teaching wash over you to renew your soul.  Develop a dialogue with Spirit and ask for guidance and clarity.

Stay present in the moment and allow the answers to flow to you through circumstances.

When action is indicated, do it.  When circumstances open up for you, move forward.  And when doors close, don’t try to break through them.  Sometimes, we need to spend a while living in the in-between: learning to let go of the need to control, the need to logically understand.

At times like these, we need to ask ourselves what we really want and why…even as we surrender the need to know how it will come about.  We need to simply align to the Eternal Presence and be present, be patient, and be still.

You don’t lack power.  You are a powerful being.  What you lack is remembrance.  There is nothing wrong with you that complete remembrance will not heal.  Like survivors who buried the unbearable agony of trauma beneath a layer of amnesia until they are ready to process it, we have chosen not to remember everything at once.  As we proceed on the path we are shown, more is revealed to us.  Through the integration and healing of each memory that surfaces, we reclaim our wholeness and power.

Powerful new healing modalities and tools for personal growth are emerging at this time to support our transformation.  We are indeed blessed to live at this pivotal time in history – and this blessing carries with it the clarion call to learn, to grow, to heal and to transform our world.  Do you hear the call?

For many centuries, mystics lived on the fringe of society.  They did not mix with the masses or participate in affairs of the world.  This has all changed.  Today, the level of consciousness on the planet has tipped the scales to offer potential for unprecedented growth and change.

Spiritually awakened beings are called to participate in this worldwide shift by becoming mystics in the marketplace – not on the mountain or in the monastery.  We are called to be the change we desire to see in the world, as Gandhi said.

To answer the call, you need to learn how to commune with your soul to access the inner guidance that is stirring there.  Every change that you wish to see in society starts with you and the field of consciousness that you are holding.

You are called to be the very change you desire to see in the world, and you change the world around you through the power of your evolving consciousness. As you consciously evolve in response to the Divine nature within, you hold the higher energies of the life force field wherein everyone’s consciousness can evolve.  In a world crying for healing, there is no greater service you can offer!

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.