Articles

When The Going Gets Tough
By Ada Porat

Why do we encounter opposition even when we act with good intentions? Why is it so difficult to stand up for our truth? And how do we cope with the expectations of others?

Recently, I committed to what I perceived as my highest truth at the time, only to encounter a wave of backlash and fallout that took me by surprise. Here are some thoughts that unfolded through the process.

Our purpose on this planet can be expressed as being energetic probes for the Divine; millions of tiny probes through whom the Divine experiences Self in all aspects of life. The fulfillment of our purpose requires mastering conscious awareness as being extensions of the Divine, and not getting lost in the dream of life.

Each human being consists of a combination of harmonic energy that is individual to each of us. As individual expressions of the Divine, we remain unduplicated in all of creation. Each of us is unique as we hold and express All That Is across time and space.

Throughout the process of life, we continually contribute information to our very Source as we experience and make choices in every given moment. And Source communicates back to us, providing guidance and clarity when we listen.

Progress on this planet is propelled by choice: the choice between truth or illusion.

By choice, we can move into new experiences or stay rooted in place. It is always up to us. Through the choices we make, every experience is communicated universally as a wave form of energy, and all of creation adjusts accordingly. Talk about power! We have the capability to influence all of creation through the choices we make!

Each of us makes choices that we believe to be optimal, given our level of awareness and insight at the time. Our choices create a resonant frequency field which attracts resonant energies and repels dissonant frequencies. Over time, this quantum attractor field draws particles of probability into becoming possibilities, and, eventually, into becoming our reality. Our thoughts eventually manifest as things.

Very often, the process of choice happens on a subconscious level through our emotions. We hook certain thoughts or beliefs out of the primordial soup of human consciousness through our emotional attachment to them. By emotionally fearing or desiring a certain outcome, we attach to that outcome. The desired or feared choice is then drawn to us through the attractor field of desire or aversion that we have created.

When observing from outside the emotions, it becomes clear that the reality we have created is in resonance with the emotions and beliefs we hold. Therefore, our choices are an accurate reflection of where we are in this moment, and as such they are perfect. When we no longer desire, fear or need the outcomes we have been creating, we can release our emotional attachment to them and choose again – dipping into the abundant Universe to create new and different experiences.

There are choices available in every moment of life: Choices that will take us down one road or another. Choices that mean the difference between comfort and discomfort, between abundance and scarcity, between peace and turmoil. Even the decision not to choose, is a choice!

Choices that are based on inner truth lead to inner empowerment. Choices that compromise one’s truth, lead to confusion.

When we make choices based on our perception of what others will think, we do not honor our truth. Likewise, when we base our choices on how other people will respond, we disregard our inner truth, give our power away and invite confusion.

Perhaps you are facing a situation that requires you to choose an action or a response. When choosing from the place of ego and emotion, you will be tempted to make a choice that is centered in the desire to be liked, accepted, safe or comfortable. And when you do succumb to these ego demands, the end result will be disempowerment and chaos.

You cannot live an authentic life by dishonoring your inner truth. There comes a time for each of us when we must choose to honor our truth and let the chips fall where they may. As Marianne Williamson has said, our playing small does not serve the world!

By choosing from the truth within, that energy field of Truth draw to it resonant frequencies, while repelling dissonant frequencies. If others in your life are at a place where there is dissonance between your inner truth and their expectations, you do not honor yourself or them by diminishing your truth. Far better it is to honor and align with your truth while releasing others to choose their own path, even when it is different from yours.

When you honor your inner truth, its growing presence in your life will reveal many illusions that have clouded your clarity of perception. Anything that is not real will be revealed, and along with this illumination may come a need to release people, places and circumstances in your life that no longer serve your soul’s truth.

As you release these redundant energies, you will find more clarity and integration in your life. If you can choose your truth despite the temporary squeals of the ego for love, popularity, acceptance and safety, you will find that you move beyond vulnerability to its demands.

The Course in Miracles teaches that Truth is not frail. Truth can withstand the demands of the ego. It can surmount the envy, wrong perceptions and judgments of others, because it needs no defense.

True power lies in choosing from within, from the strength of having owned your fears, from the gentleness that you carry with grace. Each time you choose to honor your truth, you are creating more resonance to empower you on your journey.

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com
This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Breaking Free From Duality
by Ada Porat

On Sunday morning, I took a hike in the mountains near my home. It was a beautiful morning, everything freshly washed and bright after the rains. Along the trail, birds were singing with gusto as they danced from bush to tree to cactus among a sea of orange-yellow daisies that covering the lower areas of the valley.

I was admiring the variety of color, shape, sound and texture: a rich harvest of bounty that lights up the desert after the winter rains.

While feasting my eyes on the rich diversity of the landscape, I caught sight of hundreds of milky quartz outcroppings lining the pathway in various shades of white. Among them I also noticed the dense black forms of basalt rock – silent reminders of volcanic activity eons ago. The two tones of white and black rocks seemed to dominate the desert landscape.

As the pathway started winding up against the mountainside, the terrain changed. As the vegetation became a little sparser, I noticed the presence of slate formations – hundreds of stones in every possible shade of grey: from dark to light and everything in between. And then, right where the trail started winding up toward the next peaks, I discovered a selection of sandstone, all in rich colors of purple, blue, red and even orange – reminiscent of the outrageously bright sandstone formations around the ancient city of Petra in Jordan. I stopped to admire the awesome shapes, colors and textures. On the shady side of the cliff, I even discovered some rocks covered in lichen the color of flamboyant chartreuse!

While taking a break at the peak, the changing landscape got me thinking about the duality of life in the third dimension…

When faced with decisions, we often find ourselves at a point between seemingly polar opposites: feeling a need to choose between options that appear as polar opposites of black or white, right or wrong, win or lose, good or bad. In our desire to make the “right “ choice, we get so caught up in weighing up the extremes that we never notice all the other options in between.

When we allow our focus to expand from the issue at hand and take in the bigger view, we may discover a wide array of choices that are available out there. Yes, there are clear-cut whites and blacks, but there is also a rich array of other options in between! And they are all part of the landscape of life. We are free to choose from this vast array whatever it is that will help us to move forward with confidence and joy.

In making decisions, we are best served when we take in the large picture first. By doing so, we become aware of other aspects that may not be evident when focusing too intently on the issue before us. Some of the questions that can assist us in choosing the most appropriate course of action, include:

Will this choice make me feel more alive?

When we choose the course of action that makes us feel alive, it nurtures our soul – and that leads to growth, joy and fulfillment at all levels.

Does this choice reflect my inner values?

Every choice that reflects our inner values, steers us in small steps to more effectively align with our life purpose. Over the course of time, these imperceptibly small moves can bring about wonderful breakthroughs. When we don’t honor our inner values in decision-making, the sum total of such choices can result in a sense of feeling lost and detached from life’s meaning.

Will this choice allow me to move forward without causing direct harm or pain to another?

Some choices in life are not easy – there may be a lot of grey options, and not many clear rights or wrongs. Our responsibility is always to make the highest choice we are capable of. Others have free will to do likewise. That means that nobody should compromise their own growth out of fear about what others may say or do. When we hold back our own growth because we are afraid of how it may affect our relationships, both parties lose. The only way to have loving, fulfilling relationships with others is for all parties to take responsibility for their own growth.

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com
This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

By Ada Porat

Truth has a way of expressing itself even when we deny it.  We may try to respond in the way we think others expect us to, but the body never lies.  The tone of voice, the body language, or the facial expression gives us away.

When I ask people, “How are you?” I often hear them respond by saying “Fine, just fine!”  And yet, I cannot believe their words because their eyes are dull - no joy there! The eyes are the windows to the soul and when the eyes are not bright with life, how can I believe their words?  There is no resonance between the inner truth and that which is expressed!

To change this pattern, start watching people. When they say they are happy, watch for another clue. Is the body language communicating the same message or is it saying something else?  Once you are able to pick up on the clues by objectively watching others, step it up a notch and start looking for the same clues in yourself.

Watching yourself takes more skill because it is a more subjective process, but don’t let that discourage you.  Simply observe yourself. When you say you are happy when you are really not, there will be a disturbance in your body language because of the conflict between your emotions and your words. When you repress your true emotions, the effort will change the rhythm of your breathing, tighten your throat, or cause you to look away. The body never lies!

You cannot avoid the truth within. So instead of avoiding or suppressing it, why not embrace your truth?  Once you start living from your inner truth, you step into authenticity.  As the conflict between your inner truth and your outer expression drops away, your body can return to peace.

You will notice that when you speak your truth, your voice carries a vibrant tone and you feel empowered.  The key to personal peace lies in that sense of alignment with your truth.  When you honor your truth, you will find yourself stepping into a place of inner harmony.  You will feel at peace, regardless of the situation you find yourself in.

There is no need to wait for these moments to occur at special times.  They can become a part of your life. When aligned with your inner truth, you can live an extraordinary life in a very ordinary world. You can be perfectly at ease, whether cooking food, washing clothes or addressing a crowd, because you are perfectly present and aligned with truth in each moment.

©Copyright Ada Porat.

This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached. Ada Porat is a kinesiologist and life balance coach who uses body/mind/spirit techniques to help clients stand in their truth.  For more information, visit www.AdaPorat.com

by Ada Porat

Are you living in the closet, imprisoned by your fears or beliefs? Have you put up walls between yourself and others around you, believing they wouldn't understand? Are you hiding your truth from co-workers, friends or loved ones, believing that they wouldn't accept you if they knew what you really believe?

If these questions make you feel uncomfortable, perhaps it is time to look at the boundaries in your life. The very walls that we build to protect ourselves, may well end up suffocating us over time.

While boundaries do afford protection, they can also create walls between us and others, blocking out new growth, learning and freedom.

Just think how often we hold back from revealing our true identity, beliefs or feelings until we feel safe that the other person will accept them. We may also hold back from sharing new insights out of fear that family and friends will disagree or ridicule us.

So what defines a healthy boundary from an unhealthy one? Acting out of fear rather than from confidence usually gives a good clue. When we start creating boundaries based on fear, these boundaries tend to hold us back from the very interaction that we crave with others. Instead, we may find ourselves cut off from others, unable to share insights along our journey of inner growth and expanding awareness.

When fear drives us to hide behind boundaries, we deprive ourselves and others from the benefit of sharing our unique perceptions of the human experience. As humans, we all share similar experiences on the journey through life. When we give ourselves permission to share perceptions and insights, the simple act of sharing can result in profound healing and encouragement.

Sharing our truth with others is not about trying to convince them to see things our way. Rather, it is about being honest and transparent in our personal process of growth. And yes, sometimes it can be scary!

When sharing your perspective with someone from the heart, it always makes a difference. At times, we may sense that someone is not ready for deeper levels of sharing. That does not mean that we should not share our truth at all – it merely means that we should be sensitive to how much to share, and not overwhelm them.

If great inventors throughout history had not shared their brand new ideas and concepts with the world, we'd still be living without electricity, thinking the world is flat, and travel by foot. Your insights may not seem as enormous as inventing space travel, yet they may be very important to the person you share with.

Have you ever shared something with someone, only to have them respond with, “Thank you, that’s exactly what I needed to hear!” They may have been waiting for a clue or confirmation to guide them in a new direction, and your words provided that.

When we allow the walls of protection to come down and dare to share aspects of our personal journey from the heart, that act of sharing becomes a gift. Those who hear our truth, have free choice to receive and apply aspects of our truth to their lives.

When we remain behind boundaries of safety, everyone misses out. We miss out on the opportunity to emerge from behind our walls of self-protection to share truth, light and love. We also rob others of the opportunity of receiving that gift, and to choose how to respond.

Personal boundaries can become a comfort zone that needs a little stretching. Growth comes when we are willing to emerge from behind the safety of that comfort zone. Sometimes we take the initiative to share with others, and at other times it is the gentle exposure to another’s perspective that helps us break free from the confines of our limiting beliefs.

We are all both teachers and students. We learn by being exposed to different perspectives and information we’re not familiar with. Sometimes we learn from people's mistakes, and at other times we learn from their examples. Others offer us mirrors in which to see ourselves - opportunities to learn and share what we have learned. When we start to consciously participate in this process, we can greatly expedite everyone’s learning process.

According to the book Cultural Creatives, there are over 50 million people who desire to create meaningful change in the world. Are you one of them?

If you desire to make a meaningful difference in the world we live in, consider dropping some of the defensive boundaries that hold back your light. Start peeking out from behind your boundaries and allow your light to shine!

When you emerge to share from the heart, you’ll find others eagerly waiting to respond. Let your light shine and help bring about the change you would like to see in the world. Shining your light can help light the way for someone else!


©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com
This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

by Ada Porat

“I'm so busy! I just don't have the time.”  That seems to be what I hear from everyone, myself included. We are all so busy... running around non-stop with more things to do than we could ever get to... We spend all our waking hours working on our “To Do” list without finding time for things that would nurture us best.

I speak with a lot of people daily, and “not having enough time” is such a constant refrain that I’ve had to ask myself -- why are we all so busy?

It may be because we are caught up in a society of go, be, do. We are so busy going places, being involved, doing things… always running.  We seem to be locked in a race against time, yet we are the very ones who create all the reasons to run around and then feel stressed!

The bottom line is that we always have a choice.  We made the choices that got us over-committed in the first place, and we have the power to change that also.

One of the best tools for sorting through our over-stuffed commitments is honest evaluation.  Before accepting or scheduling that next activity, how about asking yourself these two questions, and answering them as honestly as you can:

1.  What will this activity give me that I don’t have now?

You say you need that second job to pay your bills? Perhaps stretching yourself so far is an indication that the 72” inch TV is not really a life necessity, or wearing the latest fashion is not worth sacrificing your health and relationships for…

2.  How will it affect my life emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically if I decline this activity?

At times, the lure of a better lifestyle or of keeping up with others’ expectations can blind us to the very things that we cherish most: our health, relationships with loved ones, those precious years while our children are around.  No amount of riches can restore these to us once they are lost.  Is the price we’re paying truly worth it? Perhaps we would be happier by scaling back some and having more time to spend with family and friends...

In the practice of mindfulness, we are reminded to take each action consciously: to eat consciously, to walk consciously, to do everything from that state of mind. We can cultivate that consciousness by looking at life the way we treat vacation... when on vacation, we savor each minute, even when we just lay back and relax.  In a very real sense, we are merely visiting Planet Earth -- we don't know for how long -- so let’s savor each minute of this visit, taking stock of our lives and finding the time to appreciate the beauty around us.

 

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com

This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Your Mind Matters
By Ada Porat

The way you think of yourself determines your success or failure in everything.

Think about this truth for a moment. What do you really think about yourself? Do you like yourself? Are you able to think of yourself as one who succeeds in all or most objectives, or do thoughts of failure dominate your mind?

If you have accepted an idea of inferiority concerning your looks, your talents, your ability to make friends or be successful, then it is time to take a closer look – that idea could be holding you back!

The truth is that we are all a mixture of talents and challenges. It is simply what you focus on, that seems to grow ever larger. You are extraordinary in many ways because you are unique. You are different from others, and therein lies your magnificence. There is no other single being in the universe exactly like you. You have talents and latent abilities that no one else can match!

Every soul in human form is divine. Some human souls perhaps display the radiance of their being more clearly because they have peeled away the layers that obscure their inner brilliance. When we look at the brilliance of others, we may be tempted to compare that to our weaknesses – but wait! Instead of doing that, recognize that your brilliance is simply in different areas.

At any given time, your magnificence is only a thought and an action away! You have no limitations except the ones you have accepted and thus imposed on yourself. The mind simply programs our emotions with the beliefs we feed it. Without exception, your beliefs help create every seeming reality you experience. This is universal law that works in every area of your life.

To reveal your true nature, your true magnificence, then, you need to identify what limiting beliefs lie hidden within. Once we identify and discard the false beliefs we hold about ourselves and our version of reality, our limitations simply disappear. The truth does frees us from within!

In three-dimensional reality, a false belief is just as powerful as a true belief. The mind has no way of distinguishing between true and false beliefs. What ever we hold in mind, tends to manifest in our reality. However, the instant you stop giving your power — your life energy or focus — to a false belief, it ceases to hold any power over you or your life..

Every human being in this majestic universe has been given the unique gift of free choice. This divine gift makes us equal co-creators with God. Because we have free choice, we each live in the kind of world we have chosen to live in. For each of us, it is solely the power of our beliefs that produce matching outcomes: physical health or disease, happy or sad emotions; and the many nuances of experience in the physical world. We create the results we get in our world, for better or for worse. If we don’t like the results we are getting, we can choose again!

Why do beliefs have so much power? Because they stem from ideas and thoughts, which are the primary reality we experience in the third dimension. In the third dimension, we deal with a world of polarity or opposites. A belief glues itself into this reality from either end of the duality spectrum. Everything in this reality has a dualistic opposite. For example, one end may be polarized into faith while the other end holds fear. Either one of these two equally strong electric states of consciousness is able to move and change your world. Fear is equally powerful to faith. Either state brings equivalent construction or destruction.

And we have freedom to choose! When you understand the interplay between the two opposites of faith and fear, would you consciously choose to remain fearful? Knowing our powerful ability to create that which we focus on, we can make better choices!

Knowing that you have free choice, you can stop beating yourself up over choices that did not serve you well. And yes, you can choose again, this time empowered by the wisdom of the insights gained!

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com
This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Living With Integrity

by Ada Porat

How do we become more effective in life?  How do we gain credibility and power?

Our power as spiritual beings is based on our integrity.  Webster’s Dictionary defines integrity as:  “…the state of being whole, entire, undiminished.”   In other words, it is the ability to align all aspects of our being and our truth into a unified, harmonious flow.  When standing in that wholeness, we are able to manifest, create abundance, effect positive outcomes and heal ourselves and others with grace and ease.

When this harmony and power is missing in our lives, there may a subconscious discrepancy among the various levels of integrity.  This discrepancy results in our broadcasting mixed signals which attracts mixed – and often confusing - outcomes. 

To walk in power and flow, we need to have harmony in four areas that collectively make up the integrity of our intention.  There needs to be unity among our thoughts, actions, words and beliefs.  When one or more of these areas is not in harmony with the overall goal, the collective impact of our efforts is diluted. 

How often have you not listened to someone (a public figure, for example) talking about an issue with seeming intensity, yet their emotional appeal did not feel credible to you.  In fact, you may have felt uneasy about it; as if something fishy is up although you cannot name it.  Later, you may realize that the person had paid lip service to a concept that was not backed by congruent action. 

Even children pick up on this discrepancy.  This is one of the reasons why children do not respond well when parents say one thing and do another.  In such communication, there is a discrepancy between words and actions which dilutes the power of the communication. 

Whenever the four areas of integrity - thoughts, actions, words and beliefs - are not aligned in our interaction, communication becomes blurred and others have difficulty understanding, believing or trusting us.  They may feel that something is just slightly off, or that they don’t feel comfortable working with us. 

The first step in restoring integrity, lies in the awareness that something is amiss.  In becoming aware of it, we can run a self-check to clarify our true desires, motives or intentions at all levels. 

If your words or actions seem to backfire, ask yourself a few questions to get clarity on the deeper reasons why.  These reasons lie at the very root of why you chose to speak, act, think or believe in a given way.  Some good questions to answer, include:

• What is it I really wanted?  
• Were my actions and words a conscious expression of the Divine in me (who needs nothing) or were they based on some  deeper need for acceptance, security, status or revenge?
• Did I set up conditions in my mind such as “If I …………… then they will …………….?”
• How did I want the other party to respond?  Why?
• Why did I get upset, hurt or angry when they did not respond the way I wanted them to?

When we have inner expectations for others to behave in a certain way, we ignore their free will and set up ourselves to be hurt and disappointed.   Moreover, we give away our power to others by expecting them to meet our needs.

Instead of diluting our power in that way, we can acknowledge our inner need for acceptance, support, love and security, and then we can start to nurture those needs within ourselves.  Each one of us knows exactly what it will take to meet our heart’s deepest longing, and so we are uniquely qualified to nurture ourselves. 

Once we nurture our inner self - our inner child - with love and compassion, our thoughts, words, beliefs and actions come into harmony and we reclaim our own power.  So give yourself the gift that keeps on giving:  nurture yourself with light and love, support yourself wherever you are at, and enjoy the benefits of harmony, peace and power!

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com

This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

by Ada Porat

A simple word search for life balance on Google turns up over 98 million references. That is one hot topic!

People are looking for balance, and here’s one reason why: A recent global study from www.HRlook.com says that the global workforce has stopped striving for a healthier work-life balance, with less than a quarter of respondents putting their private lives before work.

Is life balance even possible in modern society? Amid the material wealth of the industrialized world, the struggle for balanced living has reached pandemic proportions. Never before in history have we had so much and enjoyed so little.

We long for balance yet take on more commitments; we dream of bigger homes but have smaller families; we pride ourselves on the size of our networks yet have fewer friends; we consume more vitamins yet are in poorer health, our life force drained by stress and anxiety. We are bombarded with information and the constant pressure of trying to keep up. So much to do, so little time! Clearly, our lives are over-segmented and off-balance – and we pay the price with less satisfaction and happiness.

Life balance is about choice – and the choice is yours!

To restore balance to life, we need to place enough value on ourselves to motivate us toward change. A life review is a great place to start. By reviewing each core area of life, we can clean out what no longer serves us and start integrating the neglected aspects of our lives again. By doing that, we step off the treadmill of chaotic living to a life filled with meaning and purpose.

A life review can start with an honest assessment of the core areas of life: your work, home environment, family & friends, spirituality, physical health, recreation and financial health. Ask yourself what the three most stressful or unsatisfying aspects are in each of these areas and jot them down.

You also need to know what you would like your life to look like. In other words, what is your vision for your life and what does life balance look like for you? Identify three aspects that you value, or would like more of in each of the core areas.

By doing this simple exercise, you will quickly discovery which areas are in need of balance in your life – these tend to be the areas where it hurts to look! You can add more balance to you life by eliminating even just one stressful activity, or by adding more of something you truly enjoy.

Balanced living is not about achieving perfection in one area of life but of finding equilibrium overall. This holistic, integrative approach allows you to feel nurtured even if you have to put in long work hours for work to meet a tight deadline, because you know that you have scheduled time to recharge with loved ones after the project is completed.

There are many different interpretations of what life balance looks like. For some of us, an unbalanced checkbook is just fine, while for others it violates their very existence. Each of us needs to clarify what we need to feel balanced, and then we need to start working towards that goal.

I often help clients look at all their responsibilities and obligations in order to reduce or eliminate those that no longer serve them. We also work on learning to say “no.” So often, I find that people say “yes” out of misplaced obligation or politeness, when what they really want to do is say NO. No, they cannot bake ten dozen brownies for the bake sale; no, they don’t want to sit on the homeowners’ association board of directors; no, they don’t want to give up a weekend to attend a distant relative’s anniversary.

At the start of each day, every one of us receives exactly the same allotment of time. What we do with that time, will determine our level of satisfaction, accomplishment and success. In choosing how to spend our time and resources, we make decisions about how to spend energy - the primary resource of life.

Borrowing from an old recycling slogan, I use three steps to assist me in the process:

1. Reduce

Do I really need this activity, item or commitment in my environment? Do I absolutely love this in my environment? Do I need as much of it to feel satisfied, fulfilled and secure? If not, it’s time to reduce my participation to make space for more fulfilling things! A good example would be setting boundaries to reduce the number of hours I work per week, or turning off my work phone when spending leisure time with loved ones.

2. Re-use

How does this activity contribute to my personal fulfillment or quality of life? Can I adapt it to better serve my goals? Can I get the same or similar benefit from a different activity? Instead of skipping gym because I am bored with the workout and then feel guilty about it, I can switch to a different type of exercise that would give me the same benefit without boredom or guilt.

3. Recycle

Have I outgrown this activity, item or commitment? Perhaps it has served the purpose long ago and I have been holding on to it out of guilt or habit! If so, it needs to go to free up space for something more appropriate. Many of our social commitments fall in this category.

When we look at life as an integrated whole, it is clear that balance can be achieved by each of us. It ultimately is an inside job – an inner strength that enables us to flow with all the things that happen from without, ensuring inner equilibrium in the midst of outer change.


©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com
This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

The Love You Desire: A Self-Quiz

By Ada Porat

Are you getting the love you desire in the way you need to feel loved?  Here is a  quick self-quiz to find out.  Give it to your partner to complete as well - it can provide you with a base for starting to define your unique love equations and take your relationship to the next level!

Self-Quiz Directions

If you have a love mate or partner, circle the number that best describes your relationship.  If you don’t currently have a love mate or partner, circle the quality of love you expect with the love mate or partner of your dreams.

 1.      I feel a bond of unity with my love mate:

         1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
         Not at all        Somewhat          Completely

2.       I am treated with consistent kindness and honesty by my love mate:

         1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
         Not at all         Somewhat         Completely

 3.     My love mate cherishes my dreams:
         1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
         Not at all        Somewhat          Completely

4.      I experience genuine equality with my love mate in all aspects of our relationship:

        1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
         Not at all        Somewhat       Completely

5.       My love mate listens to my heart:

          1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
          Not at all         Somewhat        Completely

6.       I experience perpetual intimacy with my love mate:

         1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
          Not at all         Somewhat        Completely

7.       My love mate honors and empowers me rather than dominating me:

          1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
          Not at all        Somewhat       Completely

8.      My love mate honors & supports self-empowerment  rather than self-diminishing or -sacrifice:

         1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
          Not at all         Somewhat       Completely

9.      I love myself perfectly:

        1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
         Not at all         Somewhat        Completely

10.    I love from my spiritual core:

         1     2     3    4     5     6     7     8     9     10
          Not at all         Somewhat       Completely

Total Score: ___ divided by 10 = ___

Self-Rating:

1-2      Love vacuum: Time for radical revision or new possibilities.

3-4      Minimal love: Time to set higher standards.

5-6      Survivable love:  Is this acceptable to you for the rest of your life?   

7-8      Decent love: But why not go for the gold?  What would move your love to a 10?

9-10   Perfect love:  Rejoice!  You have mastered the area of love!

Acknowledgement: This quiz is based with gratitude on the work of Scott & Shannon Peck.   

©Copyright  Ada Porat.

This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached. Further information about Ada Porat and her integrative approach to body-mind-spirit healing may be found at http://www.adaporat.com or by dialing US 602-283-4628 (MST).