Articles

by Ada Porat

A simple word search for life balance on Google turns up over 98 million references. That is one hot topic!

People are looking for balance, and here’s one reason why: A recent global study from www.HRlook.com says that the global workforce has stopped striving for a healthier work-life balance, with less than a quarter of respondents putting their private lives before work.

Is life balance even possible in modern society? Amid the material wealth of the industrialized world, the struggle for balanced living has reached pandemic proportions. Never before in history have we had so much and enjoyed so little.

We long for balance yet take on more commitments; we dream of bigger homes but have smaller families; we pride ourselves on the size of our networks yet have fewer friends; we consume more vitamins yet are in poorer health, our life force drained by stress and anxiety. We are bombarded with information and the constant pressure of trying to keep up. So much to do, so little time! Clearly, our lives are over-segmented and off-balance – and we pay the price with less satisfaction and happiness.

Life balance is about choice – and the choice is yours!

To restore balance to life, we need to place enough value on ourselves to motivate us toward change. A life review is a great place to start. By reviewing each core area of life, we can clean out what no longer serves us and start integrating the neglected aspects of our lives again. By doing that, we step off the treadmill of chaotic living to a life filled with meaning and purpose.

A life review can start with an honest assessment of the core areas of life: your work, home environment, family & friends, spirituality, physical health, recreation and financial health. Ask yourself what the three most stressful or unsatisfying aspects are in each of these areas and jot them down.

You also need to know what you would like your life to look like. In other words, what is your vision for your life and what does life balance look like for you? Identify three aspects that you value, or would like more of in each of the core areas.

By doing this simple exercise, you will quickly discovery which areas are in need of balance in your life – these tend to be the areas where it hurts to look! You can add more balance to you life by eliminating even just one stressful activity, or by adding more of something you truly enjoy.

Balanced living is not about achieving perfection in one area of life but of finding equilibrium overall. This holistic, integrative approach allows you to feel nurtured even if you have to put in long work hours for work to meet a tight deadline, because you know that you have scheduled time to recharge with loved ones after the project is completed.

There are many different interpretations of what life balance looks like. For some of us, an unbalanced checkbook is just fine, while for others it violates their very existence. Each of us needs to clarify what we need to feel balanced, and then we need to start working towards that goal.

I often help clients look at all their responsibilities and obligations in order to reduce or eliminate those that no longer serve them. We also work on learning to say “no.” So often, I find that people say “yes” out of misplaced obligation or politeness, when what they really want to do is say NO. No, they cannot bake ten dozen brownies for the bake sale; no, they don’t want to sit on the homeowners’ association board of directors; no, they don’t want to give up a weekend to attend a distant relative’s anniversary.

At the start of each day, every one of us receives exactly the same allotment of time. What we do with that time, will determine our level of satisfaction, accomplishment and success. In choosing how to spend our time and resources, we make decisions about how to spend energy - the primary resource of life.

Borrowing from an old recycling slogan, I use three steps to assist me in the process:

1. Reduce

Do I really need this activity, item or commitment in my environment? Do I absolutely love this in my environment? Do I need as much of it to feel satisfied, fulfilled and secure? If not, it’s time to reduce my participation to make space for more fulfilling things! A good example would be setting boundaries to reduce the number of hours I work per week, or turning off my work phone when spending leisure time with loved ones.

2. Re-use

How does this activity contribute to my personal fulfillment or quality of life? Can I adapt it to better serve my goals? Can I get the same or similar benefit from a different activity? Instead of skipping gym because I am bored with the workout and then feel guilty about it, I can switch to a different type of exercise that would give me the same benefit without boredom or guilt.

3. Recycle

Have I outgrown this activity, item or commitment? Perhaps it has served the purpose long ago and I have been holding on to it out of guilt or habit! If so, it needs to go to free up space for something more appropriate. Many of our social commitments fall in this category.

When we look at life as an integrated whole, it is clear that balance can be achieved by each of us. It ultimately is an inside job – an inner strength that enables us to flow with all the things that happen from without, ensuring inner equilibrium in the midst of outer change.


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