Articles

Free Yourself From False Suffering
by Ada Porat

Emotional pain can traumatize us long after the event that triggered it. The more traumatizing the event, the more we tend to think about it and so we keep the pain alive.

Why do we do this?

Most often, we simply do not realize the power of our thoughts. We don’t recognize that it is not the traumatic event, but our thinking about that event, that continues to perpetuate the pain.

The mind does not know the difference between actual events and thoughts about them. To the mind, thoughts are as real as the events they represent, and so we keep reliving the painful trauma of past events as long as we replay these thoughts in our minds.

How can we stop this cycle? Breaking free requires that we recognize the process and choose different responses to it. As soon as we stop giving our life energy to memories or events that seemed to be overpowering, those memories lose their illusion of power. In the very moment of choosing differently, we are also released from the belief that we have to suffer for what had happened to us in the past.

Negative memories, states or events do not have an individual, independent existence. We simply allow ourselves to be hurt or tyrannized by memories of the past because we falsely believe that what happened in the past, has power over us now.

Think about it for a moment: in order for the person who broke up with you to still be able to hurt you now, in this moment, they need to be breaking up with you now, at this very moment! In reality, the event has passed and is no longer taking place in your present reality – yet you continue to suffer because you are replaying the details of the event in your mind, allowing the memories to trigger pain each time you think about them!

Nothing, absolutely nothing can have any power over us unless we give it that power. When we truly understand this principle, we can begin to free ourselves from the painful memories of the past.

Instead of seeing ourselves as victims of circumstances beyond our control, we can begin to recognize our innate power to choose what we focus on. And whatever we choose to focus on, becomes our reality.

Our perception produces what we experience. This perception is made up of many different elements, all of which are based on our interpretation of reality – not an objective reality. When we view events through these filters of our perception, we relate to such events through the filters of our desires, expectations and fears.

In other words, it is the filters of our perception that create our view of any given experience and give it meaning. It is not the relationship breakup that causes our current pain, then, but the painful meaning we attached to that memory. Our perception labeled the event as “heart-breaking” or as our “one and only chance at love” or as a “vicious betrayal.”

The event in itself was simply part of the ongoing unfolding of life – it was neither good nor bad. It's only our interpretation of the event that creates the joy or pain we associate with it.

If it is our perception that causes the pain, then, why we don’t just let events happen spontaneously without grabbing onto them and interpreting their ‘meaning’ from our particular viewpoint? Why do we choose to see pain in what has happened?

I believe that we interpret events through the filters of our perception because we have become so used to pain and suffering that we are not sure who we are without something to suffer over. As strange as it may seem, we welcome the familiar pathways of pain because it makes us feel real.

But who is it that needs to feel pain to feel real? It's always the false self - the ego – that thrives on the drama of emotional pain. At the same time, you and I are not just egos; we are spiritual beings who live in human form with the ego as our constant companion.

This is great news for those of us who wish to free ourselves from false suffering and find a higher way of life! It means that the perception of pain did not originate with our true identity as souls; it stems from the ego’s attempts to resist change and maintain the status quo at all costs. All those conditions that seemed so real and painful are the creation of faulty perception as directed by the ego!

It was our misguided belief that the event had the power to hurt us that made it appear painful and propagated its existence. Once we recognize that we can choose to move our focus away from it, the energy around the memories loses its power and we find grace to move on.

We can greatly accelerate this process by bringing some fresh logic to the situation. Everything that is created has both a beginning and an end; therefore, everything we experience over the course of life, eventually passes to make room for new events and experiences. And so, even the most painful events of our lives also pass with time. We can facilitate this process by not keeping the memories of these events going through our own thoughts.

Even if we have suffered for a lifetime because of the way our perception interpreted what happened to us, we no longer need to suffer this pain. Once we see how the process works, we no longer need to be a victim of our own misunderstanding. We can inwardly say to that suffering ego state,

"Ego, you are not the ruling power in my life – you only think you are. The knots in my life that have me all tied up have no power over me outside of my own perception. It is ego’s perception that led me to interpret these events as pain, but now I choose to see things as they really are."

Once we understand that so-called negative events are not powerful in themselves, we can turn away our focus from the ego’s attempts to re-run the painful perception and causing us relentless suffering. Instead, we can turn toward the place of Truth within to release the past and reclaim our peace in this present moment.

When we release the past to the Source of all creation, we become free at last to embrace our eternal birthright of peace in this present moment.

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit www.adaporat.com
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